In the Way

Work has always been. This time it is different. I have actually found something I am passionate about. For once in my silly little life I realize a passion for singing. Allow me to expound. I started a band with some folks from work. A rock band to be more precise. I had an idea of how fun it would be for about 12 years. That's when I wish I had started. I was quite wrapped up in pleasing my parents with stable aspirations such as graphic design and other artistic pursuits but had never felt driven. We yeah, I had but it was the sort where I was driven to maintain a home and a means to feed myself. Yet I never felt a need to strive for it. Like an itch to scratch. It has never happened before. That is, until now. I realized that holding down a bunk job is easy to do. I hate it most of the time so I needed to find something else to do. I kept searching in practical paths. Nothing. No feeling of joy. No aptitude to encourage me. I have felt like I have nothing to offer.

Music has been there like a soundtrack to my life every step of the way. It finds me and fills me with such vitality when I hear something incredible. It moves my emotions. At times it speaks so clearly to me that I feel as if it is something tangible. Like I can swim in it. While I have known that I have an excellent untrained voice, I never knew that I could be putting it somewhere that would bring such satisfaction and fulfillment. So, a band. Buzz Kill Bill is the current name though I doubt it will stick. We are as amateur as we can be but you gotta start somewhere right? We mostly do covers so far but we have begun writing about three songs. It is wildly fun. Also, to break the shakes of nervousness when singing in front of others, I have taken quite a liking to going out for karaoke. Last week was the first time that Mightydoll had ever really heard me sing with any real effort. She found it quite sexy :D Anyway, the gist is I finally found something to busy myself that makes me very happy.